I guess right now i feel like crap. ERgh.
LIke this huge feeling inside me wants to explode.. but it just can't coz i'm bound by.. something. X_X

I don't know why i did what i just did. I dunno if that was what i really wanted. It's crazy, I mean serisously I knew Either way I'd feel like crap. but I can't help wonder what it woudl be like if I chose the other way..Better, possibly.

I'm so annoyed too. parents. Need i say more? :|


I wanna just leave this place n start somewhere new again. Especially for New year, which hapens to be TOMORROW, then My bday! woooot 17!

Planet shakers too X] Happiness..

Hopefully, That'll help me in all this stupid decision making Blehhh..


xoxoxo Sunshine
posted by lilshortiy @ 8:52 PM





i dunno whats wrong with it all. I can't put it down in words at all. i dunno why im feeling like this... It hurts like hell to think that he can get over it so easily. I ono if I still have feelings for him.. or if i ever did.
I mean, I didn't do anything. Well, Neither did he, just.. the whole... attitude he gave me today rly screwed me over. Just... Maybe its my high expection thing... and me seeing everythign more than what it really truely is. Juat.. i can't get over it.

I wanna. do somethign abotu it. but i dont know what to do. I want everythgin to be over, I reaaaally want to move on.. but BUT >> ARgh i hate that word. everthgin woudl be fine witouth that word.. and its meaning.

Life is short. Each decision I make, alters the rest of my life. And It seems to be going the wrong way...


Him and I are nothing. There I SAID IT. N O T H I N G

---

I'll get over it soon enough.

~sarah

posted by lilshortiy @ 2:55 AM





I'm back from my holiday! Not that many of you noticed... lol. Well, Yeah, I havn't been posting much because of certain things in my current confusing life.. and it sucks. Meh.

Yeah, Well, I've been doing a lot more traditional art, and my style and stuff has improved! Well, I think so. I'll post some of them, and hopefully they will be done digitally..:dance:

Holidays are going well.. I got a ton of holiday homework to do, and about a billion things to update. X_X Oh well.. I'll get it over and done with VERY SOON...

I can't stop thinking about it. I seriously can't get it off my mind. I need a break from things. A lot of things. I just can't bring myself to say it. I can'y bring my self to say a lot of things. Everytime I manage to get it off my mind, it comes creeping back, N i can't help but feel 'wieghed down'. That's a bad thing right?

My desicions for 2006 have proven to be wrong.. N i want to fix them all before 2007.. Coz i want to start new.. again. Without anything dragging from '06 to '07..

I'll get round to do it. Soon.

xoxo sarah
posted by lilshortiy @ 6:51 PM





Screw this I hate... Hate everything. Bloody parents and.. Everyone.. they think nothing of me.. and why do grades matter so much to everyone? Just coz I get shit, or not as great as 'her' doesn't mean I can't do other things.

Ppl only seem to care when its affecting them. Anything else, I have to fix, or redo, or be incharge of. Not necesarrily co i want to. Coz I have to, I cant let ppl down.

I dont wanna do anything today.I dont wanna go shopping for anyhting, i dont wana get outta the house, but NO i have to, coz this stuff has to be done. and it wont be unless someone will go and do it. And no one else will.

and? I hate Brad. He is the worst leader of all. He is so damn disorganised, and i dont learn a thing. which defeats the purpose. He thinks he's so great, and goes around dissmissing everything our group says 'been there, done that'.

They think they can do it all. Yeah. sif. I dont care anymore. I dont care abotu anything. all this shit is getting to me, and i dont wanna think about it anymore. Don't wanna think abotu anything anymore.

i hate it
so much.

i hate hate hate.

HATE.

Infact,

I wanna ... do something... violent.

I dont want it.

I dont care.

One day I'm gunna explode with it all. Or jump off a cliff, or run away.

I hate the world.

and almost eveyrhting in it.

U know what else? I can't even stand her voice. It reflects everything I'm not.
posted by lilshortiy @ 3:34 PM

After going through all those diaries and journal entries from a year or two ago, I feel so drained… So... exposed. It’s as if everything has resurfaced again. All the problems I faced and hid, or put beside me has come back up again. Everything feels so heavy, like it’s pulling me down. Like, every time I want to move forward, it comes back, sucking me deeper into it all… Do you think it’s possible…? Not that anyone listens.

And there’s nothing I can hold on to. Except one… And I know my relationship with him isn’t too good. It needs to be worked on. I’ve tried my whole life to fix it up, things just wont fall into place. And it’s usually my fault; I’m the one who always goes astray… Giving in to everything… trying to live my life with no regrets… But it doesn’t really work out... right?

But maybe that’s the thing… I’m getting to comfortable where I am now… or I was too comfortable. And now, everything that I failed to notice before has finally emerged, and I don’t like it. At all.

posted by lilshortiy @ 4:06 AM


Here shall be my blog...and that's it.. no links, no nothing.

Today we got our reports from school.. I'm not so happy with mine, and I was absolutely crapping myself about having parents see the report... But it went ok, I was redeemed because of all the rest of my 'improved' marks.

I don't know what to do.. I am like bored out of my mind. I'm supposed to, or I want to draw pics of all the RP characters, They are drafted out, but I havn't done anything final just yet... I should.. possibly tonight.

I need to recharge my phone so badly... and I really want a 3 phone.

Y'know.. Having a bf is majoly overrated.. It's nothing that hugely great... And like, I've had other things that make me feel tons better, or so much more, 'whole'... I dunno.. People make it seem like its the best thing that ever happend to them.
But that's proved to be wrong for me, all it's ever brought me is problems. I don't know if i want to break it up, because I mean like, I'm scared.

And the only reason I would break it up, is because of one person... and well... I can't have everything... I k now that. Just that. ARGH.. I can't choose.. Ok, this will sound lame but, omg I forgot what i was going to write.. DAMMIT.. oh well, It'll come back to me eventually.=]

But I made my decision. I'll stick with it. No matter what. I hope.

Next year I'm in 3 of Gope's classes! I'm happy about that. But not as happy as I thought I would be...

I'll keep telling myself, 'live with no regrets' But I regret. A lot of things. It messes with me, and I can't concentrate on anything but what I did.. and how much better things would be if I didn't do those things.

Just over a year ago..

November 20th 2005
"I'm so scared.. I have the blade rith next to me.. I don't wanna do it.. I'm frikin shaking.. I dunno.. I can't cry no more, I don't wanna..I ono wat to say.. I can hardly breathe..
everythign feels so cold, Dad called me a faliure.. a waste of time n money.. somethign i missed.. Myfault.. the ..."

.. I had to get it outta me.. Just, one of the billion things in my life that I regret...

Blog later...

~Sarah E.Tong


posted by lilshortiy @ 2:37 AM

I guess right now i feel like crap. ERgh.
LIke this huge feeling inside me wants to explode.. but it just can't coz i'm bound by.. something. X_X

I don't know why i did what i just did. I dunno if that was what i really wanted. It's crazy, I mean serisously I knew Either way I'd feel like crap. but I can't help wonder what it woudl be like if I chose the other way..Better, possibly.

I'm so annoyed too. parents. Need i say more? :|


I wanna just leave this place n start somewhere new again. Especially for New year, which hapens to be TOMORROW, then My bday! woooot 17!

Planet shakers too X] Happiness..

Hopefully, That'll help me in all this stupid decision making Blehhh..


xoxoxo Sunshine
posted by lilshortiy @ 8:52 PM





i dunno whats wrong with it all. I can't put it down in words at all. i dunno why im feeling like this... It hurts like hell to think that he can get over it so easily. I ono if I still have feelings for him.. or if i ever did.
I mean, I didn't do anything. Well, Neither did he, just.. the whole... attitude he gave me today rly screwed me over. Just... Maybe its my high expection thing... and me seeing everythign more than what it really truely is. Juat.. i can't get over it.

I wanna. do somethign abotu it. but i dont know what to do. I want everythgin to be over, I reaaaally want to move on.. but BUT >> ARgh i hate that word. everthgin woudl be fine witouth that word.. and its meaning.

Life is short. Each decision I make, alters the rest of my life. And It seems to be going the wrong way...


Him and I are nothing. There I SAID IT. N O T H I N G

---

I'll get over it soon enough.

~sarah

posted by lilshortiy @ 2:55 AM





I'm back from my holiday! Not that many of you noticed... lol. Well, Yeah, I havn't been posting much because of certain things in my current confusing life.. and it sucks. Meh.

Yeah, Well, I've been doing a lot more traditional art, and my style and stuff has improved! Well, I think so. I'll post some of them, and hopefully they will be done digitally..:dance:

Holidays are going well.. I got a ton of holiday homework to do, and about a billion things to update. X_X Oh well.. I'll get it over and done with VERY SOON...

I can't stop thinking about it. I seriously can't get it off my mind. I need a break from things. A lot of things. I just can't bring myself to say it. I can'y bring my self to say a lot of things. Everytime I manage to get it off my mind, it comes creeping back, N i can't help but feel 'wieghed down'. That's a bad thing right?

My desicions for 2006 have proven to be wrong.. N i want to fix them all before 2007.. Coz i want to start new.. again. Without anything dragging from '06 to '07..

I'll get round to do it. Soon.

xoxo sarah
posted by lilshortiy @ 6:51 PM





Screw this I hate... Hate everything. Bloody parents and.. Everyone.. they think nothing of me.. and why do grades matter so much to everyone? Just coz I get shit, or not as great as 'her' doesn't mean I can't do other things.

Ppl only seem to care when its affecting them. Anything else, I have to fix, or redo, or be incharge of. Not necesarrily co i want to. Coz I have to, I cant let ppl down.

I dont wanna do anything today.I dont wanna go shopping for anyhting, i dont wana get outta the house, but NO i have to, coz this stuff has to be done. and it wont be unless someone will go and do it. And no one else will.

and? I hate Brad. He is the worst leader of all. He is so damn disorganised, and i dont learn a thing. which defeats the purpose. He thinks he's so great, and goes around dissmissing everything our group says 'been there, done that'.

They think they can do it all. Yeah. sif. I dont care anymore. I dont care abotu anything. all this shit is getting to me, and i dont wanna think about it anymore. Don't wanna think abotu anything anymore.

i hate it
so much.

i hate hate hate.

HATE.

Infact,

I wanna ... do something... violent.

I dont want it.

I dont care.

One day I'm gunna explode with it all. Or jump off a cliff, or run away.

I hate the world.

and almost eveyrhting in it.

U know what else? I can't even stand her voice. It reflects everything I'm not.
posted by lilshortiy @ 3:34 PM

After going through all those diaries and journal entries from a year or two ago, I feel so drained… So... exposed. It’s as if everything has resurfaced again. All the problems I faced and hid, or put beside me has come back up again. Everything feels so heavy, like it’s pulling me down. Like, every time I want to move forward, it comes back, sucking me deeper into it all… Do you think it’s possible…? Not that anyone listens.

And there’s nothing I can hold on to. Except one… And I know my relationship with him isn’t too good. It needs to be worked on. I’ve tried my whole life to fix it up, things just wont fall into place. And it’s usually my fault; I’m the one who always goes astray… Giving in to everything… trying to live my life with no regrets… But it doesn’t really work out... right?

But maybe that’s the thing… I’m getting to comfortable where I am now… or I was too comfortable. And now, everything that I failed to notice before has finally emerged, and I don’t like it. At all.

posted by lilshortiy @ 4:06 AM


Here shall be my blog...and that's it.. no links, no nothing.

Today we got our reports from school.. I'm not so happy with mine, and I was absolutely crapping myself about having parents see the report... But it went ok, I was redeemed because of all the rest of my 'improved' marks.

I don't know what to do.. I am like bored out of my mind. I'm supposed to, or I want to draw pics of all the RP characters, They are drafted out, but I havn't done anything final just yet... I should.. possibly tonight.

I need to recharge my phone so badly... and I really want a 3 phone.

Y'know.. Having a bf is majoly overrated.. It's nothing that hugely great... And like, I've had other things that make me feel tons better, or so much more, 'whole'... I dunno.. People make it seem like its the best thing that ever happend to them.
But that's proved to be wrong for me, all it's ever brought me is problems. I don't know if i want to break it up, because I mean like, I'm scared.

And the only reason I would break it up, is because of one person... and well... I can't have everything... I k now that. Just that. ARGH.. I can't choose.. Ok, this will sound lame but, omg I forgot what i was going to write.. DAMMIT.. oh well, It'll come back to me eventually.=]

But I made my decision. I'll stick with it. No matter what. I hope.

Next year I'm in 3 of Gope's classes! I'm happy about that. But not as happy as I thought I would be...

I'll keep telling myself, 'live with no regrets' But I regret. A lot of things. It messes with me, and I can't concentrate on anything but what I did.. and how much better things would be if I didn't do those things.

Just over a year ago..

November 20th 2005
"I'm so scared.. I have the blade rith next to me.. I don't wanna do it.. I'm frikin shaking.. I dunno.. I can't cry no more, I don't wanna..I ono wat to say.. I can hardly breathe..
everythign feels so cold, Dad called me a faliure.. a waste of time n money.. somethign i missed.. Myfault.. the ..."

.. I had to get it outta me.. Just, one of the billion things in my life that I regret...

Blog later...

~Sarah E.Tong


posted by lilshortiy @ 2:37 AM

Name;; Sarah E Tong DOB;; january 5th 1990 Website;; www.sunshine-sunset.deviantart.com

December 2006


December 2006

Links Section.
Brushes by Annika von Holdt
Layout by Photokicho My deviant Art Other blog spot

....Photos here